SOME serious father-son bonding going on today. After a number of hints from four-year-old Ronnie, I agreed to take him to a football match – Queen’s Park against East Fife at Hampden this afternoon, specifically.

Over lunch beforehand, I said to him: “Are you still looking forward to the football?”

“Yes,” he replied.

“And do you know the rules of football?”

“No.”

“That’s a pity – I was hoping you could explain them to me.”

UPDATE at 5.30 pm: Sadly, the bonding exercise didn’t last long. Ronnie got bored and asked if we could leave the stadium five minutes after kick-off. No reflection on the Spiders, I hasten to add. Maybe it wasn’t, with hindsight, the best game to take him to anyway – it was a goalless draw.