REMEMBER when Fathers4Justice eejits chucked condoms filled with purple flour into the Commons chamber during PMQs a few years ago?

Well, the considered response of the House authorities to such a breach of security was swift and (ahem!) effective: they locked the door that connects the Strangers’ Bar with the Terrace outside. 

No, seriously.

One friend remarked at the time: “If someone assassinates the Prime Minister they’ll probably respond by closing Annie’s Bar!”

I’m reminded of that occasion when I read some of the analysis of the expenses scandal and what responses there should be to it: a constitutional convention is one idea. Electoral reform (naturally), reducing the number of MPs, direct election by the Commons of select committee chairmen!

The next time your own MP proposes such changes in direct response to what has happened over expenses, ask him/her how often constituents have raised any of these solutions. 

This is nothing more than a sleight of hand, a distraction. There are only two reasons why any MP might want to talk about wider constitutional reform instead of what we do to clean up the expenses system. Either:

  • they want to talk about anything other than the expenses system; or
  • they’re LibDems and will use any event — expenses scandal, family funeral, natural disaster on the other side of the world, swine flu — to talk about “fair votes”.

And can you actually imagine a worse time for parliamentarians to talk about far-reaching and (presumably) irreversible constitutional reforms than when we are under such fierce attack and the object of derision for the overwhelming majority of the electorate? Can anyone name one good law conceived in the midst of a blind panic in order to assuage a ravenous media and a vengeful public?

Constitutional reform is a pet subject of politicians, and I doubt if the public feel like indulging politicians in anything right now, least of all if it means taking part in a self-indulgent and self-regarding “big conversation” about subjects which they see as utterly irrelevant to the matter at hand.

If there needs to be major constitutional reform, then it will have to wait until the electorate are ready to listen to us again. That moment is yet some way off.

In the meantime they have every right to insist that we get our House in order as far as expenses go. Because if the public don’t trust us to fill out our expenses claims correctly, I have a feeling they’ll be less than comfortable about letting us draw up a new constitutional settlement for the entire nation.